Do opposites really attract?

In fairy tales we are often shown that in relationships like belongs with like. Take Thumbelina, who wasn't happy until she found a man who was the same size as her. Or Sleeping Beauty, the story of a princess who fell in love with a prince even though she didn't know he was one. But in real life does it really work like that? And if it does, should it? Should the good-looking, the geeks and the emos stay with their 'own kind'? In my opinion, no. If we all did that I think we'd wind up being bored. If we all went out with someone who shared exactly the same interests as us and had the same type of personality, where would the spark come from when we ran out of things to talk about?
There are some fairy tales that suggest opposites attract, such as Aladdin and The Little Mermaid. Despite different backgrounds the couples in these stories fall for each other and get their happy endings. So are fairytales giving us mixed signals? Perhaps. And in real life can it work both ways?
There are many areas where opposites could, in theory, cause problems. For example, different religious backgrounds, social standings and views on marriage could all stand in the way of a relationship. But maybe when it comes to love most people wouldn't let it.
Yet, in a world where some people believe in destined-to-be-together soul mates, others see their spouse as their 'other half' and the rest see it as just good chemistry, how do we know when we've found our perfect match? How do we know they're worth fighting for?
If fairy tales are anything to go by, nobody has control when it comes to love, and it comes in all shapes and sizes. Some people will fall for someone they never expected, while others will get the person they've been dreaming of since they were little.
And if you're lucky, or happen to be a Disney princess, then you'll get your happy ending. Here's hoping!

You shall go to the Ball!

With the Summer Ball tomorrow, it's got me thinking about Cinderella, a story that has turned the concept of a Ball into somewhat of a fairytale setting. Take a look at the vast collection of high school films that focus on characters at their prom. They make their way there in style (swapping horse and carriage for limousine) and spend hundreds of pounds on outfits. And when they arrive at the prom, we're given the impresion that these are events where anything and everything can happen. Romances can spring from long-standing friendships and the unpopular kid can become an overnight celebrity at his school. And for Cinderella it was a bit of both. She got to dance with the prince while every other woman in the room looked on in jealousy. And although we know we won't get to dance with a prince, and we don't have a Fairy Godmother who will grant our wishes, there is still something special, something magical, about attending a Ball. We make that little extra effort - dress to impress, take hundreds of photos - all to ensure we have the best night possible.
For many of us girls, the first thoughts to enter our minds when we hear about a Ball is 'New dress! New shoes!" Just like Cinderella we want to feel and look like a princess for a night. The only other chance we'll get for this is probably our wedding day, so we need to lap up every chance we get! And let's face it, it's not often we get to see the guys we know looking good in a suit...not hard on the eyes at all :P
So, in whatever context, attending a Ball is special. Everyone is in the mood to party, and you get the feeling that something amazing could happen. Yet, for Cinderella, the real fairytale began after the scene of the Ball. But how likely are we to lose a shoe and just leave it lying around, hoping whoever finds it will search the entire campus to return it to us? It's a romantic notion, but completely far-fetched, and kind of desperate!
In my opinion, the Ball Cinderella attended was not all that. It's famed as the party the entire kingdom wanted to attend, the major event of the year. But in reality it would probably have been a dull gathering of uptight upper-class snobs who had no idea how to have fun. Cinderella wasn't lucky enough to have a ferris wheel, dodgems, Feeder and balloon hats to entertain her! And perhaps that's the real reason she left before midnight :P

Villains and Heroes

Lately I've been thinking about the way fairytales portray heroes and villains. With villains, most of the time it's the wicked witch, the old hag or the evil queen that we're warned to beware of. They're presented as ugly, malicious creatures who are inately immoral. But 'Beauty and the Beast' is one story that turns this tradition on its head. In this fairytale, the beast is the hero and the supposedly most handsome man in the village is the villain. Yet, it is more common to see villains presented in an unflattering light. For example, Cinderella is tormented by what are explicitly stated as ugly step-sisters and Red Riding Hood is set up by a big bad wolf. But in real life, the bad people aren't so easy to spot. Most of them don't look the way you might expect them to. But where have these expectations come from? Why should somebody capable of doing evil have to look like a monster? In our world it doesn't work like that. Like Gaston in 'Beauty and the Beast', the bad people are often the ones who look fairly normal (if there is such a thing). Perhaps, then, fairytales are the main culprit in leading us to grow up believing that evil people look evil.
This isn't only applicable to villains. Most of the heroes in fairytales are also stereotyped. They're usually seen as overly handsome, brave men who save the girl in the name of love. But, in my opinion, that man - the one who rescues the princess from a fire-breathing dragon and still remains flawlessly handsome after being knocked around - he doesn't exist. Real-life heroes are anything but superficial, and they usually have no agenda other than to make the world a better place. Why should good looks be necessary to a heroic act? It shouldn't, and isn't. We learn this from 'The Hunchback of Notre Dame', where once again, the villain and hero roles are inverted. The villain is a religious man you would expect to be good, and the hero is a somewhat scary-looking loner you would probably avoid when walking down the street. But guess who ends up saving the day?
I guess what I'm saying is, although some stories redeem others, most of the traditional fairytales have a lot to answer for when it comes to the way we think and how we see the world. As we grow older, naturally we realise that things are not as black and white as these stories suggest they are. In real life nobody is entirely bad or entirely good, and people aren't always what they appear to be. And maybe, in our world, there is no such thing as villains or heroes. Perhaps there is only human nature.

Beauty and the Bad-Boy

Belle made her way across the dark campus, fighting against the wind and rain. She could see the building ahead of her, only a few feet more. With the final steps she reached into her bag, rummaging around for her keys to the front door. Standing at the entrance, seconds turned to minutes as she realised she had forgotten them, along with her phone. She glanced up at the windows, finding each to be dark and empty. Great, she thought. No one's in and there's a storm coming.
The rain continued to fall in zigzags and Belle continued to panic. Then through the darkness she spotted a boy walking to the neighbouring halls. From afar he looked like someone she knew, but as she got closer she realised she didn't. Yet, she did recognise him. She'd heard stories about him. Friends had portrayed him as a dark character, a notorious bad-boy rumoured to have beaten up a female teacher and two students the previous year to the point of sending one into a coma. Mere footsteps away from the boy, Belle began to consider that perhaps this was a bad idea, that maybe she was safer standing in the rain.
"Are you okay?" he asked, staring at her. Dressed in black, he almost dissolved into the shadows.
"I'm locked out of my halls," replied Belle. Her eyes drifted to a scar on the side of his face, which made her all the more wary of him. "But my friends should be here in a while."
"I can call someone to help if you like? My mate's the Senior Student. You can come wait in my kitchen. I'm Adam by the way."
"Umm, okay. Thanks. I'm Belle." Taken aback by his willingness to help, Belle remained suspicious as she followed Adam. Despite his friendliness she couldn't help but feel intimidated by him. What if the rumours were true? He did look a bit shifty. And she didn't know anyone else in his building.
After climbing the stairs to Adam's corridor, Belle was surprised to find it deserted, disturbingly silent.
"Seems really quiet," she said timidly.
"Everyone's gone home for the weekend."
As he spoke the lights flickered to darkness, casting eerie silhouettes on every wall. When they had reached the kitchen Adam made his way towards a phone on the far wall.
"No tone. The storm must have taken all the electricity out."
"Don't you have a mobile?"
"No credit."
Belle grew more uneasy with each passing second, but there was nothing she could do. She took a seat at the kitchen table, glancing momentarily at Adam. As her eyes rested on him, she realised he was staring back at her, his expression serious, almost angry. She smiled awkwardly, shifting her gaze to the floor.
"You alright? You seem a bit nervous." Adam took a seat opposite Belle, his eyes still fixed on her. "Well, I guess you've heard the rumours."
A slight shift in her seat and she gave herself away.
"It's just gossip. I didn't put anyone in hospital." He suddenly looked hurt, judged. "It's all just a bunch of lies by a girl I used to go out with. People believe them 'cause I look the part, you know, a bit rough aroung the edges, and like to keep to myself. But anyone would think I was some kind of animal."
"So you didn't beat anyone up?" asked Belle, a tremor in her voice.
"Only the guy she cheated on me with. But he walked away from it. No doctors needed."
"Oh god, I can't believe some people can stoop so low. I mean her, spreading rumours. Not you beating the guy up. That, I'm sure, was deserved."
"Hey, it's just words. I'm alright. The people who believe them are the ones you should feel sorry for."
Adam and Belle talked far into the evening, their conversation ranging from how Adam got his scar to Belle's love of literature. Minutes turned to hours, and they almost didn't notice when the lights came back on.
"So this was kind of fun. In a strange way," said Adam after calling the Senior Student.
"Yeah. Hey, we should be blackout buddies," giggled Belle. "Next time there's a power cut I'll come see you."
"Sounds good, but can I see you before that? Say like tomorrow?"
It caught Belle off guard but she agreed, and after numbers had been swapped and smiles had been exchanged, she left the building, happy in the knowledge that she had a date.

Trip to Neverland

It began like any typical day for a student. The house creaked with the snores of four friends as Peter, Wendy, John and Michael dreamed the day away. They lived for the night, and the one they had planned required as much rest as possible.
Early evening, as they wiped the sleep from their eyes, they cracked open the cheap vodka and red bull, growing tipsy as it flooded their blood streams. After each had drank their last drop, the four friends made their way into town.
At their favourite nightclub, Peter got the first round. Drinks in hand, he pushed through the swarming crowd towards his housemates. Swaying to the pounding music and blinking through the flicker of neon lights, he quickly checked his pocket to make sure the packet of pills he'd just acquired hadn't fallen out.
"Alright, guys," he shouted over the music as he passed his friends the drinks. "Vodka lemonade for you, and two ciders. And guess what? I got it. Get ready for a good night."
"Oh, hell yes!" exclaimed John.
"Who'd you get it from this time?" asked Wendy as Peter slipped a pill into her hand.
"This guy they call Hook."
"Why do they call him that?" asked Michael.
"'Cause he gets you hooked on this stuff!"
"Same stuff we had last time?"
"No, John mate. It's better. It's new. They call it Fairy Dust."
"Well then, take me to the fairies!" John swallowed his tablet, and the others mimicked.

In the early hours of the morning, after three clubs and more pills than they could count, the four students made their way across the bridge that would lead them home.
"Hey, what you doing? We're supposed to be coming down now." Wendy tugged at Peter as he swallowed another pill.
"I'm just getting started."
"Peter, she's right," cut in Michael. "I admit, it is good stuff, and we had a great night. But, come on man. Let's get home in one piece."
"I'm bloody invincible though." Peter climbed onto the bridge railing. "And you know what? I can fly too."
"For god's sake, get down." Wendy grabbed his arm, but he shoved her away.
"You can fly too, Wendy! Come on, we'll do it together. Just think of something good."
"Are you crazy?" shouted John. "Get down."
"Look down there." Peter pointed to the water under the bridge. "Those pirates. They want a piece of me."
"You're bloody high as a kite."
"I will be. You watch. On the count of three I'll show you I can fly. Ready? One, two-".
At three, Peter became the boy who never grew up.

Wishful Thinking: Stars, Lamps and Fairy Godmothers

In my opinion, the true essence of a fairytale, and the thing that distinguishes it from an ordinary story, is the element of unreality. In other words, the possibility of the extraordinary. This is why magic, true love and adventure is so captivating. They're things we rarely get in the real world. And a major theme that runs throughout many of these childhood tales is wishing. In the fairytale world, wishes can come true via shooting stars, age-old genies and fairy godmothers. Ask and you recieve. But in our world, it's not so easy, and the things we want don't just appear at our feet in a cloud of smoke. Most of the time we have to work hard for the things we desire.
The belief that if you wish on a shooting star it will come true is an old superstition that has been around a long time. I figured that it might originate from a fairytale, but I could be wrong. Yet, there are instances of wishing on stars in the world of fantasy, and one story that comes to mind is 'Pinocchio'. Although not in the original version, Disney's addition of Gepetto's wish on a star for his puppet to become a real boy makes it a little more magical. You're probably all familiar with the rhyme that goes with it, 'Star Light, Star Bright, first star I see tonight' etc. Turns out this rhyme dates back to nineteenth century America. So the idea of wishing on stars has been around for quite a while.
Although the Blue Fairy brings Pinocchio to life, she tells him that his becoming a real boy must be earned. Just like in our world, this shows the things Pinocchio wants rely on his own actions to manifest into reality.
'Aladdin' is probably the best known fairytale associated with wishing. The genie is famed for his place in folklore as the ultimate wish-granter. But this story conveys the moral that with a little self-belief we can achieve our dreams and desires ourselves. The reason Aladdin wishes to become a prince is because he believes Jasmine wouldn't look twice at him if she knew he was poor. But in the Disney movie we can see a spark between the two when they first meet in the market, no genie present. Aladdin doesn't need magic to attract the princess. We'd all like a genie who can give us whatever we wish for in the blink of an eye, but if we were handed everything for free we'd never develop the talents and personality that come from the lows as well as the highs in life.
Finally, 'Cinderella', with its Fairy Godmother, is a well-known story of wishes coming true. When Cinderella's attempts to attend the Ball are thwarted, help comes in the form of the magical godmother she never knew she had. Perhaps the message we can derive from this is that the people in our lives, our friends and family, can be turned to during the times we lose sight of our goals. Sometimes life seems harsh, and we might be told by others to stop dreaming and get back to reality. But everyone is working towards something, and we all have wishes. Maybe, if we're not afraid to accept help when its offered, we'll move a little closer to our dream. If Cinderella hadn't had faith in her godmother's ability to get her to the Ball she wouldn't have had her happy ending. Even though she had been treated badly by her step-mother and step-sisters, she still hadn't lost trust in the kindness of people. And this, I feel, has an impact on our abilities to grant ourselves our own wishes; faith in others and in ourselves.
There are a lot of cliches associated with wishing, one being 'be careful what you wish for'. But this seems to take the magic out of it. Wishing is a sign of hope, in my opinion, an indication that one has faith in the possibility of extraordinary things happening. However, simply sitting back and hoping fate will work its magic is not likely to do much good. Wishful thinking paired with effort - that's more promising. In a world where magic is shoved into a corner, and wishing on stars is considered naive and childish, that perfect partner and big promotion will most likely require us to make the first move, and fate the second. But I may be entirely wrong, and those lucky people who swear they've found their soul mates, as well as the ones who've won millions on the lottery, might beg to differ.

A Christmas Carol: A Dickensian fairytale

It seems that in the blink of an eye the year has sped past and finally Christmas is here, along with the year's end. During these last few weeks of the year magic can happen. For many of us Christmas can be uplifting, bringing us optimism and confidence, a feeling of 'what the hell, I'll give it a go'. It's our last chance to make 2009 the best it could have been, one final opportunity to do the things we might regret if we don't; we know that January will bring back all the hesitations and 'what ifs' we had before. Then it begins all over again, another year, and December seems a lifetime away once more.
At the turn of one year to the next we're often compelled to re-think our lives, contemplate what we achieved during the past 365 days, what we could have done better, what we lost sight of. At this time of year the past comes back to haunt us, and the future looms in front of us, sometimes mockingly. Yet, with all the parties and celebrations that come with this festive season, a lot of us try to live in the present, leaving the past and present exactly where they belong. These conflicts between what lies behind us, before us, and what we're experiencing right now are explored in the classic Charles Dickens novel 'A Christmas Carol'. The moral most people draw from it is that we should be considerate of others, predominantly those less fortunate, and always keep in mind that money can't buy happiness. However, even though Scrooge is visited by the Ghosts of Christmas Past, Present and Future in order to learn these lessons, these otherworldly characters can teach us something else; the importance of learning from the past, living in the present, and not worrying too much about the future. And I think that at this time of year it is all the more necessary to keep this in mind. But one without the other can have bad consequences.If you dwell in the past, going over all the mistakes you made and picturing the things you would change if given the chance, you will probably end up neglecting the present. Then that will become another regret. Yet, if you live too much in the present, party hard and give absolutely no consideration to the future, you might end up kicking yourself for lack of foresight when you get there. So when it comes to the past, present and future, balance is needed, and this is what we can gain from 'A Christmas Carol'. Scrooge is forced by the ghosts to think about his past, present and future, all in the same night...and on the other side of dawn he's a changed man. Perhaps the message of this is that an evaluation of our history can sway our future, and a look at our present can make us feel better about the past being where it is. Scrooge is shown both happy and unhappy memories from his past, including the moment he became more concerned with money than loved ones, leaving his fiance to concentrate on business. Therefore, looking back opens his eyes to his present, highlighting how different he is to the man he once was, happy and in love. We've all done things in the past we regret, some we wish we could change, but all things that have brought us to the point we are in our lives right now. And where we are now, the choices we make in the present, they influence our future, determining where we'll end up and who with. It's a never-ending wheel; past, present, future, and as present becomes past future becomes present. I'm one who's guilty of giving too much thought to the past and future, and too little to the present. Then frustration kicks in as what is becomes what was and I begin to wish I'd given more thought to my present when it was just that. The present is where we have the most freedom. The Ghost of Christmas Present in 'A Christmas Carol' is portrayed as a jolly giant, the friendliest of the three spirits. I think his pleasant demeanor shows just how flexible and yielding our present is. It may not seem like it, but it's the one tense we have most control over, and the one that has power over the other two. If we're in a good place in the here and now, we'll move away from the past, taking the good memories with us, discarding the bad ones; and we'll feel ready to experience the future, confident in our ability to shape it to what we want for ourselves. With New Year's approaching it's easy to get caught up in the past and think ahead to the future. Even I'm doing it, right now, by writing about the New Year, which is 2 weeks away! It's so easy to fall into the trap. But we do live in a world where the future is always being thought about, always being worried about. From concerns about global warming to essay deadlines, our minds are always on overload with what's around the corner. And sometimes the future ends up dictating to us, manipulating our decisions, controlling our present. We get scared that we aren't ready, that we won't know what to do when the future turns into our present. But Dickens' representation of the Ghost of Christmas Future as a grim-reaper figure with an ominous message for Scrooge shows that, in some cases, trying to look ahead can be detrimental. If we really knew what was coming our lives would lose all the mystery that life offers. If you knew where you would end up working, who you would wind up dating, and how long you would live, you'd probably get bored very quickly, and quite possibly scared. The future is more fun when it's a surprise. The areas of love and career especially are something we can anticipate, a reward to be worked towards. Well, hopefully at least. Hope is all we can have, the belief that the future will hold something good for us. Scrooge is shown his future death, which, sadly, is something to be found in all of our futures. But, as can be drawn from Scrooge's reaction, nobody really wants to know when something like that will happen. If we give too much thought to the future, to when something is going to happen, for example, a positive thing such as finding love, by the time we find it we will have become so obsessed with it that the real thing will be ruined by our anticipations. I think the fact that Dickens' Ghost of Christmas Future is completely concealed by a black cloak conveys the idea of the future as unseen, undetermined, and unwritten. If our present is a pen, it writes our futures and crosses out our past. We, our present selves, shape the life our future selves will live. If we take each moment as it comes and don't dwell on past mistakes or future choices, we have the license to make the future what we want it to be. But a little thought here and there of past and future won't hurt. When Scrooge is faced with the image of his future grave he says 'I will live in the Past, the Present and the Future' and I think this balance is something we should all strive towards as we move into 2010. So while you're celebrating with friends and family, unwrapping a different kind of present, and counting down to midnight on New Year's Eve, try to keep in mind that 2009, though it may have had many good memories, is now the past. Regrets are not worth dwelling on. And 2010 is the future, nothing to worry about at the moment, because que sera sera and all that jazz. Live in the moment, the in-between, the present. And have fun embracing the unknown. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year people! See you on the other side :)